full pattern of non-stop egoic activity controls and binds our energy
and attention in every moment: searching for this, defending from
that, etc., to the point where we do not have the free energy and
attention left over to find and receive God, even when God is appearing
bodily in the same room, in the form of the Spiritual Master.
Awakening from the dream also requires self-understanding
understanding of the activity that is the ego.
this "ego"? How is it organized? How can it be undone,
Melted, and how can we, ultimately, be Fully Awakened out of the
dream? Figure 1 provides an overview of the complex ego-pattern.
1: the structure of the ego
view “me” as a given; it simply goes without saying. "Obviously",
there’s “me” here, there’s “you” over there, etc. And somehow, “me”
is associated with a human body, “my body”. Consequently, the survival
and defense of the body-mind becomes equivalent to the survival
and defense of “me”. And the feelings associated with the body-mind
are “my feelings”. If they are pleasurable then it is “my
if they are painful, then “I
We can refine
the notion of “me” in all kinds of ways, even thinking we’re being
“spiritual” to do so. We can wonder if “me” survives physical death.
We can give a name to the part of “me” that survives, and call it
“soul” or “spirit”, and concern ourselves about its destiny, since
that is a part of “my destiny”.
And on and on.
“ME” is the focus of all our lives. And yet how often do we question
this “me” presumption? How often do we consider, what is the source
of the sense of “me”?
on the basis of this presumption, even organizing our entire life
around it, and don’t often stop to ask: What is this “me”?
From the viewpoint
of the Awakened State, it is clear that all the “me”s in the dream
have no ultimate reality; they are dream characters, and the only
Real “Me” is the Divine Being, the One who is dreaming and living
all the apparently separate “me”s. Furthermore, from the Awakened
Viewpoint, it is also clear that the reason “me” seems and feels
in every way to be an absolute reality despite the fact that
it is not is because of a primal activity of separation that
each of us is doing unconsciously all the time. Literally, we are
re-creating our “self” in every moment through an activity of “contraction”
that is something like making a fist. Whatever else you may want
to say about the occasional pleasures that can be experienced within
the “me” capsule, they are nothing compared to the “open hand”,
the Bliss felt when the sense of separation is transcended. The
primal self-contraction also creates secondary “knots” throughout
the body, some of which are directly recognizable by many people,
such as the “vital shock” or knot near the navel or solar plexus: